It’s time to confess

From St. Augustine’s Confessions
 
"What, then, is time? If no one asks me, I know what it is. If I wish to explain it to him who asks me, I do not know. Yet I say with confidence that I know that if nothing passed away, there would be no past time; and if nothing were still coming, there would be no future time; and if there were nothing at all, there would be no present time.

But, then, how is it that there are the two times, past and future, when even the past is now no longer and the future is now not yet? But if the present were always present, and did not pass into past time, it obviously would not be time but eternity. If, then, time present–if it be time–comes into existence only because it passes into time past, how can we say that even this is, since the cause of its being is that it will cease to be? Thus, can we not truly say that time is only as it tends toward nonbeing? (Book 11, Chapter 14)"

 
Do you get it??
 
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Congratulations! You have purchased an extremely fine device that would give you thousands of years of trouble-free service, except that you undoubtably will destroy it via some typical bonehead consumer maneuver. Which is why we ask you to PLEASE FOR [HEAVEN]'S SAKE READ THIS OWNER'S MANUAL CAREFULLY BEFORE YOU UNPACK THE DEVICE.... YOU ALREADY UNPACKED IT, DIDN'T YOU? YOU UNPACKED IT AND PLUGGED IT IN AND TURNED IT ON AND FIDDLED WITH THE KNOBS, AND NOW YOUR CHILD, THE SAME CHILD WHO ONCE SHOVED A POLISH SAUSAGE INTO YOUR VIDEOCASSETTE RECORDER AND SET IT ON "FAST FORWARD," THIS CHILD ALSO IS FIDDLING WITH THE KNOBS, RIGHT? AND YOU'RE JUST NOW STARTING TO READ THE INSTRUCTIONS, RIGHT??? WE MIGHT AS WELL JUST BREAK THESE DEVICES RIGHT AT THE FACTORY, BEFORE WE SHIP THEM OUT, YOU KNOW THAT? -- Dave Barry, "Read This First!"

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4 Responses to It’s time to confess

  1. Kelly says:

    I love it! I dread assembling my son\’s Christmas presents…I spend days getting all his toys together then he plays with them for a couple of minutes and breaks them. I find pieces of assembled toys in his room for days.Thanks for visiting me…this is a great space you have!Kelly

  2. Unknown says:

    Hi there!Thanks for stopping by and for the compliments. If you want really good writing, definitely visit Kenny\’s space and Lana\’s space. They put me to shame! Their links are on my blog list. But thank you! I dont "try" on my blog, else I would feel like I was at work. So it\’s not, to me anyway, that great!I like your blog — you have an interesting life and a great family! I\’ll definitely be back.Keith, also a link from my blog, lives in Houston too. He has a great site and is an awesome guy!Take care.j

  3. Frannie says:

    I need to send that to my brother in law. He refuses to read any directions. Yet his brother will not remove anything from the contents until he reads ALL of the instructions. Go figure?I hope you have a fantastic weekend!

  4. ÇAĞRI BURAK says:

    beatiful one space do meet want my e-mail adress cagriburak@hotmail.com

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